Saturday, 29 March 2014

Section 136

Things are going from bad to worse. I've been feeling really suicidal and my self harm is bad.
On Thursday night I sat in my car facing the river, all I had to do was to take my hand break off and I would have rolled into the river.
I wish so much that I had done just that. However the police found me and sectioned me. They took me to the local hospital as a place of safety. They can hold you for 72 hours.
After a night in what looked like a prison cell I was interviewed by the psych and social worker and allowed home. I'm just feeling so unsafe and crap and have plans to hurt myself.
However it is Mother's Day tomorrow so I had better try to keep going
My ex husband is being threatening and abusive and says he is coming back to the uk to sort me out! I'm forever watching my back and feel frightened and unsettled.
Life is as crap as always

Tuesday, 18 March 2014


Sunday, 26 January 2014

Getting worse :-(

I have been in and out of the psychiatric hospital and am just feeling lower and lower. I'm not sure anymore if I can just carry on.
Last night I stood by the river in my pyjamas and just wanted to jump into the stillness and calm. I can't believe I walked away and didn't jump. Maybe it was a trial run?
My ex is back from Thailand and I'm frightened, work is crap and everything just seems so hard.
Just don't really know what else to say!