Been at the crisis house for two nights. It is good to have somewhere safe to go and the staff here are lovely but the other patients are hard to be around and pretty triggering. They kick off, scream and shout and then self harm, take overdoses etc
If they can't keep safe here then what are they like normally? There is always someone to talk to who will listen and calm you down and they go out of their way to write plans to support you. Some people just don't want to be helped but just like drama and chaos.
It is so unsettling when your feeling crap anyway. 2 people have walked out and another girl just does the opposite of what she is told all the time.
I find it hard to see others self harming when I'm trying my best not to. It's a constant battle for me. Not going off in my car is also hard but I must try and get the support I need and stay focused
Nights have been bad and it's good to have someone to talk to but they can also see how much I'm struggling which makes it easier for services to help me. Often I can't explain what is going on but this way they can see it. The crisis team come and see me and they will help me when I go home later in the week
Mental health is just so complex - I don't really understand it